Hope & Attachment

Hope & Attachment

We’ve all had moments of feeling let down when we “got our hopes up” about something. And, I get it. It hurts. We often feel like there’s something wrong with us for having hope in the first place. But I don’t feel like hope is always the...
Real Relationships Aren’t Always Pretty

Real Relationships Aren’t Always Pretty

Sometimes in our attempts to foster healthy relationships we can get a little avoidant of conflict. Or unforgiving of someone saying the wrong thing or even having an intention we don’t agree with. In our discomfort (or downright dismay) we can get to a place of...
Overcoming the Shoulds

Overcoming the Shoulds

The shoulds show up a lot, don’t they? And they make us feel so disempowered. I see my clients regularly get caught up in shoulds. I even see them notice and call out the shoulds. But even in doing so it can be hard to figure out how to be less subjected to...
Internal VIPs

Internal VIPs

We all have people in our lives who we’ve internalized to some extent – like parents, mentors, parents of choice, partners, friends, etc. These are called attachment figures. Parents and caregivers will have the strongest role initially in our lives. The...
There’s No Such Thing as TMI in Therapy

There’s No Such Thing as TMI in Therapy

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – there’s no such thing as tmi in therapy. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I wanna know all about your poop problems. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Sexy mishaps. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The thoughts that pop in and scare you and feel unmentionable. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ That embarrassing...
Be Awkward

Be Awkward

In session, my clients say the most amazing things. Things that help others hear their hearts and foster closeness. ⁣ ⁣ I often ask, “Have you shared that with _______?” ⁣ ⁣ And many times, they say no. ⁣ ⁣ When I ask why not, awkwardness comes up a lot as...
Trauma Informed as a Way of Being

Trauma Informed as a Way of Being

There’s a lot of talk about being trauma informed. And trainings. I’ve taken a lot of them.   By all means, a structured way to learn about common ways people feel safe or unsafe related to specific experiences is important.   However, I would caution...
Rethinking “No Boundaries”

Rethinking “No Boundaries”

The more I go along in this work, the more I learn that fundamentally changes the way I view so many things. This past year, I participated in an intensive training called DEEP. DEEP is a fusion of attachment theory, somatic approaches, trauma therapy and depth...
Creating A Life

Creating A Life

This past weekend, I got to hang out with several friend-colleagues that I absolutely adore and respect among the trees and mountains in Washington. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ We danced, had sing-a-longs, played games, got lost in the wilderness and overall co-created a space for us...
Power Need Not Explain Itself

Power Need Not Explain Itself

Last weekend I was in the Somatic Experiencing Training and as part of the experience, we practice on each other and have 1-on-1 sessions with SE Practitioners. In SE, your body guides the experience. As you follow the body, you narrate the experience – both...