Your Anger is Welcome Here

Your Anger is Welcome Here

Women are often sent the message that their anger is not welcome, unacceptable, “unbecoming of a lady.” It’s such an engrained part of our culture that it’s easy to not realize when we might be sending that message to each other. This can have...
Trauma Happens Across All Lived Experiences

Trauma Happens Across All Lived Experiences

Trauma happens across all lived experiences and you can’t tell who has experienced trauma or not just by looking at someone. Many trauma survivors get really good at hiding it. Some survive by excelling at everything and anything that they can. That’s what...
Your Life, Your Choices

Your Life, Your Choices

I often hear clients talk about the not-so-subtle shoulds that loved ones sling their way. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “What does your therapist say?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You’re barking up the wrong tree.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You just need to get over it.”...
Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance often gets a bad rap, but, like many things life, it can actually be a really useful quality. How many social justice movements have been propelled by defiance? If you’ve grown up in an oppressive household, wouldn’t defiance be useful? ⠀ One of...
Internal VIPs

Internal VIPs

We all have people in our lives who we’ve internalized to some extent – like parents, mentors, parents of choice, partners, friends, etc. These are called attachment figures. Parents and caregivers will have the strongest role initially in our lives. The...
Healing is Within You

Healing is Within You

Each of us is designed to heal. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ For example, if you get a little scratch on your arm, you will bleed, but then the blood will clot to create a scab. Your body will also send some inflammation to the scratch to puff up the skin and help close the wound....
Healing in Spirals

Healing in Spirals

By all means, I am not the first person to say this and I definitely won’t be the last.⁣ ⁣ Whether it’s a loss, a trauma, a difficult relationship or experience – healing occurs in spirals.⁣ ⁣ When we are acutely in a difficult life experience it can...
Honor Big Feels

Honor Big Feels

We often get stumped by big feelings.⁣ ⁣ Feelings that may have been deemed “inappropriate” or “off-limits” during our upbringing.⁣ ⁣ Feelings that our attachment figures didn’t know what to do with – therefore, we don’t know...
Feeling With

Feeling With

Culture tells us that emotions make us weak, soft or broken if in abundance. This narrative will have us believe that there is something wrong with us when feeling emotional and it can lead us to disconnect from ourselves. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I used to really believe this and...
Reality Check Regarding Power

Reality Check Regarding Power

While hanging out in turtle mode, I realized that perpetration has actually been in power for a long time.   At the time, I felt pretty defeated by this idea. It made me feel sad and a bit hopeless.   However, I sat with it and digested this idea and now I feel...