Your Life, Your Choices

Your Life, Your Choices

I often hear clients talk about the not-so-subtle shoulds that loved ones sling their way. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “What does your therapist say?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You’re barking up the wrong tree.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You just need to get over it.”...
Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance often gets a bad rap, but, like many things life, it can actually be a really useful quality. How many social justice movements have been propelled by defiance? If you’ve grown up in an oppressive household, wouldn’t defiance be useful? ⠀ One of...
There’s No Such Thing as TMI in Therapy

There’s No Such Thing as TMI in Therapy

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – there’s no such thing as tmi in therapy. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I wanna know all about your poop problems. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Sexy mishaps. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The thoughts that pop in and scare you and feel unmentionable. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ That embarrassing...
Healing is Within You

Healing is Within You

Each of us is designed to heal. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ For example, if you get a little scratch on your arm, you will bleed, but then the blood will clot to create a scab. Your body will also send some inflammation to the scratch to puff up the skin and help close the wound....
Honor Big Feels

Honor Big Feels

We often get stumped by big feelings.⁣ ⁣ Feelings that may have been deemed “inappropriate” or “off-limits” during our upbringing.⁣ ⁣ Feelings that our attachment figures didn’t know what to do with – therefore, we don’t know...
Feeling With

Feeling With

Culture tells us that emotions make us weak, soft or broken if in abundance. This narrative will have us believe that there is something wrong with us when feeling emotional and it can lead us to disconnect from ourselves. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I used to really believe this and...
Be Fabulous & Vote

Be Fabulous & Vote

Everyone is saying to vote right now and I think it’s hard to feel motivated to go vote when our political system is so complex and you might not know where to start. ⠀ True story – despite going to social work school and being super passionate about...
Reality Check Regarding Power

Reality Check Regarding Power

While hanging out in turtle mode, I realized that perpetration has actually been in power for a long time.   At the time, I felt pretty defeated by this idea. It made me feel sad and a bit hopeless.   However, I sat with it and digested this idea and now I feel...
Emerge

Emerge

I’ve been quiet lately. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ I’ve needed to be. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ The last several weeks have been really hard. And alongside my fellow survivors and allies I’ve felt disheartened, rage, betrayal, concern, triggered, etc. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ So, I went inward...
Legacy of Trauma: It Didn’t Start With You

Legacy of Trauma: It Didn’t Start With You

We repeat what we do not heal. Trauma is like a legacy. Any trauma that happens now is a reflection of another hurt that happened before. Many times even generations before. When we grow up amid trauma and oppression, we do our best to cope. And sometimes that coping...