The Secret to Finding a Therapist You Vibe With

The Secret to Finding a Therapist You Vibe With

As I look forward to my next steps in practice, I’ve been percolating on the idea of some kind of online self-help style course for trauma survivors. There’s a lot to consider to do this and do this well. So, even though I am in the early stages of...
Your Anger is Welcome Here

Your Anger is Welcome Here

Women are often sent the message that their anger is not welcome, unacceptable, “unbecoming of a lady.” It’s such an engrained part of our culture that it’s easy to not realize when we might be sending that message to each other. This can have...
Explore Insecurity

Explore Insecurity

Insecurity, like many difficult feelings, is one we often try to banish. However, the more we avoid insecurity, the stronger it tends to grow. ⠀ ⠀ Instead, I invite you to get curious. ⠀ Why is insecurity showing up now? What beliefs, thoughts, feelings, actions are...
Trauma Happens Across All Lived Experiences

Trauma Happens Across All Lived Experiences

Trauma happens across all lived experiences and you can’t tell who has experienced trauma or not just by looking at someone. Many trauma survivors get really good at hiding it. Some survive by excelling at everything and anything that they can. That’s what...
Hope & Attachment

Hope & Attachment

We’ve all had moments of feeling let down when we “got our hopes up” about something. And, I get it. It hurts. We often feel like there’s something wrong with us for having hope in the first place. But I don’t feel like hope is always the...
Real Relationships Aren’t Always Pretty

Real Relationships Aren’t Always Pretty

Sometimes in our attempts to foster healthy relationships we can get a little avoidant of conflict. Or unforgiving of someone saying the wrong thing or even having an intention we don’t agree with. In our discomfort (or downright dismay) we can get to a place of...
Overcoming the Shoulds

Overcoming the Shoulds

The shoulds show up a lot, don’t they? And they make us feel so disempowered. I see my clients regularly get caught up in shoulds. I even see them notice and call out the shoulds. But even in doing so it can be hard to figure out how to be less subjected to...
Your Life, Your Choices

Your Life, Your Choices

I often hear clients talk about the not-so-subtle shoulds that loved ones sling their way. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “What does your therapist say?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You’re barking up the wrong tree.” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “You just need to get over it.”...
Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance Doesn’t Have to Be Bad

Defiance often gets a bad rap, but, like many things life, it can actually be a really useful quality. How many social justice movements have been propelled by defiance? If you’ve grown up in an oppressive household, wouldn’t defiance be useful? ⠀ One of...
Internal VIPs

Internal VIPs

We all have people in our lives who we’ve internalized to some extent – like parents, mentors, parents of choice, partners, friends, etc. These are called attachment figures. Parents and caregivers will have the strongest role initially in our lives. The...